From: Robert Meadows
Subject: Response to Letters

Dear Ray,  Thanks for your letters.  I have held your one from last year
for a year while I thought about what to write.  Am I slow or what?  No,
I have been wanting to write but have put it off until now.  I hope this
gets to you and I will also send it overland.

It was good to hear from you after all these years.  I have often
wondered what happened to you and I'm glad you found me.  thanks to
Ken Moody also who has been good to me.  I will attach my Christmas/
New Year's letter which will catch you up in the last few years.  Much
has gone under the bridge!  My father died in 1978 and my mom moved to
Philly last year, but wants to move back to live in Pgh.  I decided to
leave Maryknoll on Dec. 8, 1965 (Feast of the Immaculate
Conception--just a coincidence).  I had worked on Civil Rights with
Martin Luther King's group that summer which was an awakening.  Then I
came back to the Novitiate.  I had never thought seriously about
leaving before, but that whole time was to give us time to think and
meditate about our life.  I decided I wasn't living enough and wanted
to explore the world more.  It was hard to leave in a way because it
felt like "quitting" as there was guilt attached to it.  A year later
I was in the Army as a social worker.  I trained in San Antonio and
Colorado and Georgia, then spent two years in Japan at a military
hospital, and then 6 months in Kansas as a s.w. in the prison.  I felt
disenchanted and confused,(1970) dropped out into the anti-war
movement and moved to San Francisco for a couple of years.  I started
a school there, worked odd jobs, hitchhiked a lot across the country,
and went to Mexico for 7 months.  I didn't know myself and wanted to.
In 1973 I went back to Pgh to work in a steel mill, then to Rochester
in 1974.  I got involved with Re-Evaluation Counseling, a peer
counseling group, then got work in a psychiatric hospital, got married
and had children.  We rehabed a old house, etc and the years passed.
I have gone to two Maryknoll reunions.  one at Glen Ellyn in 1985 for
our 20th, and one at Ossining in 1995 for the silver jubilee of the
men who were ordained.  I have really enjoyed reconnecting with these
men with whom I have shared so much especially early idealism and hope
and fun times...and times on the sports fields.  I am working in
social work both in a long term care center for aging and as a private
practiioner psychotherapist.  I really enjoy the last work the best
and am getting tired of the former.

    My children are at the end of the teenage years.  Actually Andrew
is a young adult.  I learned a lot during those years-not always easy.

    My in-laws live in Houston and Dallas.  My wife's parents used to
live in Alpine, Tx but my mother in law died in 1996.  We are having a
Zaiden family reunion (Mom's Lebanese side ) in Pgh in July, 10 this
year I believe.  Perhaps our trails will cross in Pgh.  I hope to
travel more Ray and would like to get back to Texas.  Thanks for your
letters and hope to talk/write to you more.  Your friend, Bob Meadows.

----------------

December 20, 1998

Dear Family and Friends,  

	It's another year and I forgot to write my last year's letter.
 Actually it was a good year in 97 so I felt less need to talk about
 it.  I'll try to catch you up with what's happening in our neck of
 the woods.  We have had a good 2 years --a bi-annual letter.

	Suzanne has taken charge of her life.  She worked one or two
	jobs and bought her own car at age 17 and pays for the
	insurance.  She also became involved in boxing in Feb'98 and
	really enjoys it. Last year she joined the Mock Trials Team
	and really enjoyed the competition of debate and trials.  She
	was also the her school representative to the Student Advisory
	Board of the City School District and was the secretary of
	that group.  She has become more focused in school and is
	focusing on getting into the Fashion Institute of Technology
	in Manhattan.  She would like to be a buyer so she can dress
	people up artistically in ways that fit their moods.  She sees
	fashion as art.  She is articulate and a real joy to live with
	as the house becomes more lively with her in it.

	Andrew has been working at Baker's Commodities for the past 17
months.  It is a rendering factory and smells terribly as they cook
down animals for their fat, tallow, etc.  He wanted to learn how to
work and hold a 40 hour job in a difficult place and has done it.  He
would like to leave but has not been able to find another job he would
like.  He started school at the community college, dropped two
courses, but really likes the Investment Course and the Law course. He
has turned 21 this month (I can't believe it has passed this quick) He
and his girl friend are expecting a child in April.  I look forward to
the child but I'm aware that it is not the easiest road to take.  I
have learned a lot from my children as teens, a lot about letting go,
and not having control of their lives, but learning to share my
feelings, thoughts, etc and staying connected.

	Rose continues to write her novel and short stories.  She has
	much more energy from using the magnets--her fibromyalgia has
	greatly lessened.  She has been going also to an acupuncturist
	and ayurvedic (Indian doctor) She quit her job in Nov. 1997 to
	work full time at writing (She has edited the South Wedge
	Newsletter bimonthly since Jan) and working on Nikken--a
	multi-level-marketing company that has magnets and far
	infrared products to help people feel, sleep and walk better.
	She just got another job at Gordon Black Associates as a
	pollster.

	I myself continue to work at Monroe Community Hospital almost
	19 years and I'm thinking about retirement sometime soon.  I
	have been doing Cultural Diversity classes there two
	days/month and it's interesting.  I've also been involved with
	some innovative work with demented patients capacity to
	consent to sexual relations. It sounds like an obscure topic
	but it is very relevant in nursing homes--we are supposed to
	be published soon.  My private psychotherapy practice is far
	more interesting to me with the challenges of being of service
	to people for them to have ever more satisfying lives.  On a
	personal level I have paid attention to two areas: one is the
	area of men's covert depression and not trying to hide it with
	work, etc or pretend.  A good book I am reading is I Don't
	Want to Talk About It by Terry Real.  I'm trying to face my
	life completely.  The other area is spirituality.  A little
	over a year ago I returned to Church (Catholic) and have been
	deeply moved as I review old teachings and push my envelope. I
	meditate and pray more, read the 12 steps and Thomas Merton.
	Perhaps I am more aware of my mortality as I grow older.  This
	spirituality has tied into Nikken as I learn to let go of old
	habits of limits I had set for myself and connect to the
	abundance in the Universe.

	Many of our friends and family have been skeptical of Nikken
	(as I was), and silent about that part of our lives.  If you
	have had bad experiences with network marketing I am sorry.
	If we have offended you in any way, I am sorry.  We get very
	excited about it as it is the most ethical rational company We
	have belonged to.  I love the thought of financial freedom and
	I especially love the products.  But it is not for everyone
	and I respect your decision about that.

	I was mugged and beat up two weeks ago because I didn't want
	to give the man my money.  It was the first time that has
	happened in 23 years, but I think I will review my options.
	It really is not worth getting hurt.  Yet in some way I think
	good will come out of this and I am grateful to be alive and
	not damaged. Finally our cat Topaz thinks he's a dog or a
	person who sits on his chair at the table waiting for his
	dinner.  Mitzi our other cat (female) prefers warm open laps.
	Zorro our dog wonders why people are moving in and out and
	tries to ponder out why others don't play as often as he
	wishes.  He is very much part of the pack and looks after us.

	I would love to travel and expect to take Suzanne and perhaps
	Andrew to Mexico in June.  I expect to see more of the world
	and spend more time talking with everyone I love.  Until next
	year on the eve of the 2000, take care and love yourselves as
	I love you.

Season's Greetings!

Bob Meadows and family